waiting (healing)

wait for the good to come. aren’t i worthy? excuses that fill my head while laying restless at 3 AM. love in all its forms must be strengthened. career and creativity and all that is part of my purpose has to expand. but not yet. i must heal while in stagnancy. cannot move forward untilContinue reading “waiting (healing)”

compliments & comparisons

west coast paid pretty, east coast esteemed wit. and the south with our frizzy hair and our humility. boost us up as we are. sweet tea or pressed juice. coffee black, please. our perception of pretty is individualistic. we are who we claim we are, and that should be enough. expect us to compare ourselvesContinue reading “compliments & comparisons”

Our Darkness

share a secret with reflections of our darkness. “I’ve never told anyone this.” if i fix her, maybe i can fix the hollow parts of me. oh. i can just fix me? as the others were outside being carefree, he said, staring at the TV’s trauma unfold, “Happened to me, too…” not an overshare, aContinue reading “Our Darkness”

The Last Letter

only cry for special occasions. here’s a clarification of my tears. if i am not diplomatic, I am over emotional. we can’t have that. the thorough breakdown of the scenario. let me explain. just the highlighted sentences in the book of an undeveloped opportunity. scurry away. come back, blatantly detached. i’m an essayist, not aContinue reading “The Last Letter”

Catholic Guilt

6.27.18 A former busybody, persistently too involved with Others. My selflessness, just a facade: am I appearing kind enough? Sincerity melting away in the pool I am floating in. The sun heats the top of head. It doesn’t gleam. It taunts. On a quest for wisdom from the moon. (It hides from me.) Whisperings amongContinue reading “Catholic Guilt”

Shadow

11.21.18 I’m in a mood, I say. But this underlying chaos rises too close every time I speak. I’m just tired, I think. Clouds of puffy smoke dance inside of me, leaning against the Exit. I spot my shadow. She is impatient. She is a warrior, ready for this stagnancy to pass. Slow and steady,Continue reading “Shadow”

masculinity (the ego)

i was not created to fuel the male ego. nor my own. entitlement leads to a toxic karmic path. i am nobody, and neither are you. we do not float along to slut shame, or to sneer at our peers for things we misconstrue. do you know me? i don’t know you. i am anContinue reading “masculinity (the ego)”

sharing our energy

7.14.18 we pass on catty words — that’s how we make friends, see? my hate is similar to your hate. we sigh and breathe insults at those we love or even better: leave a gust of silence so still it leaves puckered red marks circling our throats. we have mouths that speak these heavy words,Continue reading “sharing our energy”

live your truth

7.12.18 How many white lies have you told? I’ve told more. How many omissions have you kept, nestled away? Bet I can beat you. I’m the best of the best. Do I do this out of compassion for others? (30%) Reality just disappoints the imagination. So many delusions, the world says. Keep the dream alive,Continue reading “live your truth”